Oh, to have a hobby!

I've decided that my new hobby will be to formally make up excuses for other people. And they have to be excuses that I would never use for myself. So, for instance, "Really in a hurry." doesn't count, as that could be a valid excuse. But, "Maybe he's just on his break..." is hobby-worthy, as I would never use it for myself.

Can you think of any good ones?