I've decided that my new hobby will be to formally make up excuses for other people. And they have to be excuses that I would never use for myself. So, for instance, "Really in a hurry." doesn't count, as that could be a valid excuse. But, "Maybe he's just on his break..." is hobby-worthy, as I would never use it for myself.
Can you think of any good ones?
Friday, September 14, 2007
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2 comments:
I do this all the time. Meet someone who is a complete ass and say "Oh, he must be having a bad day." The best way to use this is to say it to the person who is being an ass, "Oh, you must be having such a bad day."
In class, when someone is not paying attention, I have said, "I am sorry, you must not be here."
There is an old stand-by and one I have liked to use for myself, "Blame it on menopause," or for a younger woman, "She must be having female problems."
We can recall Frank's great excuse from childhood, "It must be somewhere." to be said with a shrug, especially as it applies to the right shoe or something else vital to progress.
About someone who has been rude, you may charitably say, "He must just be passing it along." as this deflects blame to the unknown someone who that person previously encountered.
I had a pair of twins in class the last semester, and I very much liked them, but they could be simply awful, very badly behaved. Once, when I was laughing at their rudeness, one of them said, "We were not raised very well." which was quite true. Their family life had been of the worst. It must be a common excuse these days.
"Blame it on youthful exuberance."
"You must have forgotten to take your vitamins this morning."
Perhaps an excuse generator would go well online? Turn your hobby into something profitable!
I wondered why you were always asking me if I was having a bad day.
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